For the second time in recent memory I had The FUD and Michael Barrymore's Swim Team right in front of me trying to mindfuck each other off The Beast. Last time The FUD was the victor, so it was Barrymore's revenge as Big John from MBST missed all the hot spots and was Alwight on The Night.

Jim Davidson's not out on bail for nothing though, and the £50 will increase to £75 next week because not even the mighty FUD could claim the cash.

Clear evidence tonight that school is back, as the fake ID's were all out in force, no doubt encouraged by the crazy prices at Gallus January sale where there's a £1 bottle of beer and £1 mulled cider going down too. 

That's better value than Primark!
Next time then it's a £75 cash jackpot - which is actually enough to buy Primark.

Chin chin

Sir James

The Bottle Merchants dominated the quiz tonight. Only the FUD could come close to MINDFUCKING them away from the winners prize. In an evening of high-score quizzing The Bottle Merchants claimed victory by only getting ONE answer wrong. An awesome night for The Bottlers.

Here’s how it finished...
The Bottle Merchants  Winners + Fun Guys
FUD
Michael Barrymore’s Swim Team
Spudguns
The Honeymonsters
Beginners Luck
Handsfree Lightsabres  Applause 

Former champions Handsfree Lightsabres were obviously too tanked up on St Enoch’s Xmas Market “Mulled Cider” - rumour has it the main ingredient is Frosty Jack’s. Awkward.

The Beast was on erratic form, stopping the FUD from his usual mindfuck routine and helping The Honeymonsters win the cash! Here they are making holes in the cloth on the pool table to celebrate their win.

Next week then it’s another £25 cash giveaway in Gallus.
Come and get it!

Chin chin

Sir James

Here's how it ended...

FUD Winner
The Bottle Merchants tiebreak heartbreak
By a Baw Hair Funnest Team
Spudguns
Handsfree Lightsabres
Quizzly Bears
Go & Stu Experience ft the same amount of tour de France titles as Lance Armstrong
Pun a Mince
Elmo Picanto Applause

Once more things were so close it came down to a tiebreaker and Chris from The Bottle Merchants wasn't feeling confident because he had never won a tiebreak before.

Chris wasn't the first man to come up against Spudguns (Oops Pardon!) but he might be the first to beat them to the beer as occasional champs The Spudz had to bow to Chris's superior knowledge of tax haven Monaco. How much his off-shore assets are worth is anyone's guess (Oops Pardon!)

Here's how it finished...
The Bottle Merchants Tiebreak kings & Winners
Spudguns lowly second place
Handsfree Lightsabres
Team GB
Gee Quiz
Dave is a Paedo
Shut up Cally  Fun Team 
Alkys on Tour
The Scotts
Pic N Mix  Applause

Next week it's going to be another top quality night. Honest.
And there's a £50 cash jackpot.

Chin chin

Sir James  

A busy night in Bar Gallus with multiple winners...

Handsfree Lightsabres booked their place at my Champions Quiz and were awarded funnest team for a joke so funny it's in my weekly email.

Honeymonsters - Virgins until they were 13 GAMBLED and came up smelling of Tuborg as they claimed the winners prize.

The other main winner of the night was 50 Shades of Gay and timezone expert Stu here who got his hands on the £150 cash jackpot - nice work. Michael Barrymore's Swimteam suggested they might use it to put animals up their arses. Just jealousy I'm sure...

Here's how it finished...
Honeymonsters - Winners
Spudguns
The Bottle Merchants
50 Shades of Gay - Cash Champs
50 Shades of Desperate
Michael Barrymore's Swim Team
Atomic Leslie
Jade Goody's Hairdryer
Quizzley Bears
Sober Team = Poor Result
Me, Myself & I
Handsfree Lightsabres
Power Bottom for Jesus
Steptoe & Son

A big well done to The Handsfree Lightsabres who became the first team to secure their place at my Champions Quiz extravaganza.

Next week the cash jackpot is back to £25, but the banter will be worth twice that.

Chin chin

Sir James

A tasty £100 rollover next week at the quiz after Tv camera guy Tim was beaten by The Beast. Nice.

Also nice was the case of beer these guys won. The Shug and Glug Depreciation Society used my Mystery Question in the final round to beat off a hard challenge from The Spudguns.

Did I say hard? Oops pardon!


Here's how it all ended...

Shug & Glug Depreciation Society  Winners
The Spudguns  Fun Guys
The Bottle Merchants
I've Been Violated by Anton Du Beke  (also violated by The Beast)
The Alkies on Tour
Supertramps
My Cousin's a Tart
The Velour Fog
Fine & Dandy
Handsfree Lightsabres
Charm School
Late Commers   Round of Applause

A notable late arrival was Handsfree Lightsabres carrying a case of beer they had already won at The Pourhouse quiz. They wanted to add my £75 to the £90 they had already won, but thank god it rolled over for the good of mankind and the sanity of The Beast who would surely never recover from being beaten twice in one night by the same quiz team.

Next week then, it's a tasty £100 and don't forget the preview here before the quiz will help you win.

Chowmein

Sir James

At Bar Gallus tonight it was the second quiz in a night for Handsfree Lightsabres as they stumbled in pissed from The Pourhouse and still managed joint 4th place.

It was a night to celebrate for Spudguns who won just about everything - except the cash as Sharon couldn't stop it rolling over to £75 next week.

In a shock final round it was regular high scorers Atomic Leslie who ended up in last place with the round of applause. 

Here's how it finished...
Spudguns          Winners & Funsters
The Bottle Merchants & The Incredible Adam Thacker
Scrambled Eggheads
4= Handsfree Lightsabres
4= Inmates
4= I've Lost My Fiver
V.B.
Fitbin
Smarty Pints
Atomic Leslie        Applause

Arriving just in time for the joke round was a large drunken group of folk - the bar staff! Judging by their friendly manner I am guessing they do love me, since they told me this 3 times. Thankfully their annual night out is not more regular.

Next week then it's a £75 jackpot and our goal is to stay as sober as the staff!

Chin chin

Sir James

A boisterous night in Gallus where everyone had an opinion on whether it was higher or lower on the cards. Only chap that knew the answer was Chris.

According to his team mate Gillian, Chris is a cock. I was interested to see she didn't change her mind when he won the money. £50 quid up, and still a cock she said. Shame.

Rumour has it Barman Martin was pictured in the Picture Round sheet getting his end away, a gentleman never tells though - so we'll launch straight into where teams finished!

Danny McGrain Loves Bacon     Winner
Spudguns
The Bottle Merchants
Atomic Leslie
Jack Douglas Tea Set
6= Scott and The Quiffs
6= Inmates
8=Handsfree Lightsabres
8=2 Ladies & The Bastards
Michael Barrymore's Swimteam
Boaby Daft is Dead
Blood Sweat and Beers

We waved goodbye to Michael Barrymore's Swim Team who are off on a 3 week pool party - Ullapool that is. Next week half the money - it's back to £25 but it will probably be twice the fun!

Sir James