Eight teams. Fifty quid. One guy reading out questions.

That's basically how the quiz went, and here's how the quiz finished...

1. Handsfree Lightsabres - Winners!
2. Iron Apes - Cash Winners!
2. Quiz in my pants - Funnest Team!
4. Quizee Raaarscals
5. When's the funny quiz guy turning up?
6. Eddie Quizzard
7. Jaggy Thistles
8. Quiztina Aquilera - Round of Applause!

The winning joke from Quiz in my pants was a lovely variation on the little girl falling off the swing joke, and there were some decent drawings handed in too...

The quiz was won by the Handsfree Lightsabres who once again were defeated by the cards. Janet used to be a dab hand and knowing when was best to go up, then down - oooh er missus! - but her skills have deserted her.

For now...

The Iron Apes, pictured at the top of the report, won the £50 (or 2 x £25 i.e. 2 ponies.... Jeez!) and celebrated by buying a shot of tequlia each.

They all paid for their shots individually, splitting 5 tenners.

Ah, I miss the student life...

Fact.

Quizguy Martin

I have to admit it looked like it was going to be a quiet one at the Brass Monkey on the 16th May due to Lana Del Rey concert but, with a late surge of teams turning up at 9 o'clock on the button, we were "Off to the races"

That's one of her songs by the way.

James Nisbet's Tartan Army won the quiz overall, and also took down the  Fun Round with a pretty topical joke...

There were 7 teams in total...

1. James Nisbet's Tartan Army - Winners and Funnest Team!
2. The Bandits
3. Quizzards Sleeve
4. Tiny Temper
5. Sorry, what was that?
6. Something funny
7. Eat dirt and dye - Round of Applause

That.

Was.

It.


Fact.

Quizguy Martin

It was a nice little night at the Brass Monkey on Thursday 9th May

It could have been busier and I could have been getting a blowjob while reading out the questions, marking the questions and reading out the answers, but we don't always get what we wish for. If that was the case though, my day to day life would be a lot more interesting.

The guy I'm molesting was from Where's the toilet? and (snigger...) what they did (snigger... ) was ask me where they toilet was whenever they were going to the toilet!

Fucking. L. O. L.

He asked if we could kiss and make up after the quiz had finished and, while I was kissing, he got his cock out. You couldn't make it up.

But, if I had a penny for every time that happened...

The quiz finished thus...

1. Handsfree Lightsabres - Winners!
2. Where's the toilet
3. Free the Tarby 1 - Funnest Team!
4. Chick Flicks - £50 Cash Winners!
5. Bar Staff
5. Great Scott
7. E for Idiot
8. Edgar
9. Chorizo rocks my world - Round of Applause!

Anyways, the Chick Flicks (pictured top) won the cash - £50 for those that weren't aware - by answering the Final Question correctly.

Simple as that.

The Handsfree Lightsabres (pictured below) took home a bottle of lovely wine, a personalised certificate, and the bloke who tried to ruin their photograph.

Fact.

Quizguy Martin

It was a busy night at The Brass Monkey last Thursday, with seven teams trying to gain pole position for the chance to take home the £50 cash prize.

Here's how it finished...

1. Cuckoo Connacher's Electrical Goods - Winners!
2. Universally Challenged
2. It's time for lemon and lime
4. Curryoke - Funnest Team!
5. Maggie Thatcher's Milky Snatch
6. Operation Yewtree's Special Cunt Stuble
7. Mad Mags - Round of Applause!

Thanks to a storming final round - and their nearest challengers, Universally Challenged, only answering 4 questions in the negatively marked final round - Cuckoo Connacher's Electrical Goods took home the booze with style just look at them at the top of this post.

After James had his 3rd go at doing the cairds ("Fix! Fix FIIIIIIX!") CCEC got to the final question for the cash. The were in high spirits - with the main spirit being vodka it seemed - and, with the question being about Bill Murray's classic movie Groundhog Day, I thought they had a chance.

Up stepped - well, shouted - Kat telling the whole pub, and the majority of Finieston, that she knew the answer and that she would bet her first born on it. BOOM! They had just pocketed £50 as you can see below.

I'll see you next week, peeps.

Fact.

Quizguy Martin

You know that way you go to write a quiz report, only to find out that your dog has taken a leak all over your quiz sheets?

No? At least it's better than 'My dog ate my quiz report'.

Must just be me. Anyways, I do remember that Handsfree Lightsabers (pictured left) won the quiz, but didn't win the money, and that Our survey says... (pictured right) won the Fun Round.

I say I remember... The pictures are pretty self explainatory.

£50 up for grabs next Thursday.

See you next week. At least I will if I remember to turn up.

Bad dog.

Quizguy Martin

P.S. I don't own a dog.

With a £300 jackpot to be won at the Brass Monkey Thursday 18th April, it was busier than a confessional at the BBC studios.

The cash was taken home by It's time for lemon and lime after knowing more than the average person about Snakes on a Plane.

Even Samuel L. Jackson didn't give a flying fuck about that movie, but I had to asp them the question and they passed with flying colours...

Look at their smiling little faces. And evil eyes!

B & H won the Fun Round with this entry. Ooooh er... Did I just say 'entry'? Yes. Yes, I did. Just checking.

They won a richness of goodies that would make Jordan blush. Bearing in mind she doesn't blush when a group of guy are spaffing in her face, you can tell the prizes were well worth having.

Apart from the one the refused to take from me. Ungrateful swines.

Below you'll find some feedback including some from people who have won the quiz, some from people who have used the quiz to take their minds of suicide(!), some from people who like to doodle mid-round, and some who believe a quiz venue should fork out some form of prize for a team who didn't win the quiz. This is on the same night the venue handed out £300 in cold, hard cash. Good luck with that...