1. Team #1 - Winners!
1. Handsfree Lightsabers
3. Brenda - Funnest Team!
4. S & A
5. The Latecomers
6. Can't get the staff - Round of Applause!

Team #1 (pictured above) took the case of booze - 24 cans to be correct! - after a tie in first place with Handsfree Lighsabers, by guessing the year of one of my favourite movies, The Big Lebowski.

Adam from Team #1 was as happy as a pig in mud. Or a Spaniard in a European Championship Final. Or Dwight Yorke in Jordan.

They bested the cairds at the second time of asking but after saying "B" for the Final Question, The Beast Jim Davidson humped them like Dwight Yorke humped Jordan. With a huge, black "D"... I'm actually quite chuffed with that line. I was originally going to write "knob". That means the jackpot rolls over to £70 next week.

Mark and Helen (pictured just above and to the right) from the team simply known as Brenda (?) took the title of Funnest Team with...

My mates quite a sensitive chap. He always cries after sex. Then again, he is in prison.

A worthy winner indeed.

I'll see you nest week for more questions, more banter, more food, more beer, more jokes, a £70 rollover jackpot and the obligatory pint after the quiz.

Fact.

Quizguy Martin

As well as Spain beating Portugal in the football later, here are some things that will happen in the quiz later!

What the hell is the ATP? We'll find out...
and hunky Australian actor Chris Hemsworth! 

Plus Jimmy Carr tax dodger jokes! What would 8 out of 10 cats think about that?


Here's hunky Australian actor Chris Hemsworth (above) choking on a Spanish sandwich - maybe this is how they will beat Portugal later? Just a thought...

Fact.

Quizguy Martin

Another knowledge-ridden night at the Pourhouse pub quiz and once again a fantastic turnout to try and win case of booze and the £90 on offer. You have to love the fact that the footie was off... trying to host a quiz while the Euros are on, is like trying to "make love" to Jordan while Harvey watches from his crib shouting angrily.

Doable but offputting.

There were 7 teams in total taking part, including a team that travelled all the way from the Kingdom of Fife!

Don't mention the bird flu. I mentioned it once but I think I got away with it.

1. Handsfree Lightsabres - Winners, Funnest Team and Jackpot!
2. The Craig Whyte Celtic Supporters Club
3. Wayne Rooney slipped one to my Granny
4. Jimmy Carr's Lawyers
5. Cuntybaws
6. Five From Fife
7. Luck Spuds - Round of Applause!

Yes, another win for the Handsfree Lightsabres who were in the lead until the Bonus Round, lost it then pulled it back in the Final Round - a big thanks to the Lucky Spuds from The Craig Whyte CSC who "helped them out" during thie Bonus Round!

No-one could defeat the cairds at the first time of asking, so we went back round and Janet from the Handsfree Lightsabres does what she does best - no not that! - and got the 4-in-a-row required.

How do you solve a problem like The Beast and his fiendishly hard Final Question?

Guess apparently.

Well done Janet and the boys - no, not her breasts, but they should probably get a mention - on their very first quiz hattrick as, along with the beer and the cash, they also won the Joke Round with...

I took the wife to the doctors to sort out her tourettes. Turns out she doesn't have it. I am a cunt and she does want me to fuck off!

Very pussyshiteknobcheese funny.

I'll see you next Wednesday 8pm for more serious quizness, but come back before then for a sneak preview on some questions that will make an appearance at said quiz.

Fact.

Quizguy Martin

To help you get some EXTRA points, here's some hints and tips on what to expect tonight at the quiz...

Showbiz - How do you solve a problem like Maria? + the NEW Spiderman film!

Pictures - this old guy appears. He may have invented something there are also some quality album covers...

Music - One of the tunes is by The Cars. That's all I'm saying.

In the Lucky Dip section expect Mount Rushmore and Oxford University.

That's all the hints for now - except to remind you that Habbo Hotel is a website crawling with paedos and writing that or something similar down will all but guarantee you the points for one question at least.

See you later

Quizguy Martin

Another Wednesday night. Another Pourhouse quiz. Another stonking turnout. Another cash rollover. Another quiz report.

Here's how it finished...

1. Ken Dodd's Dad's Dog's Dead - Winners!
2. 668: The neighbour of The Beast - Funnest Team!
3. Handsfree Lightsabres
4. Late because of the football
5. Pull out before you quiz
6. Captain Fanny & Optimus Cock do it with a Monster
7. Face Eaters Anonymous
8. David Cameron's Missing Kids - Round of Applause!

As you can see it was a fantastic turnout for the second week running with 8 teams in total turning up to watch the second half of the Huns Vs Junkies football match. That's Germany Vs The Netherlands for you PC folk. They were also there to try and win the meal plus a drink for their quiz team as well as the £70 cash that was up for grabs.

The Handsfree Lightsabres started off strongest leading through the first three rounds, with Ken Dodd's Dad's Dog's Dead a point behind every step of the way.

The pivotal moment came during the Bonus Round where, after giving a pretty obvious clue for 3 bonus points, Stu from Captain Fanny & Optimus Cock do it with a Monster guessed the wrong movie. What a fanny and cock for making such a monster error. That gave Ken Dodd's Dad's Dog's Dead a chance to guess. Guess they did, and they took a massive two point advantage.

They held on to their lead and won the meal plus drinks, but they failed at the challenge of the cairds, as did the 2nd and 3rd placed teams when it was their turns.

Up stepped Paul from Late because of the football and they got the 5 in a row with the cairds to take them to the Final Question.

Unfortunately their knowledge on Singapore Polis wasn't up to scratch and The Beast told them to Singapore Sling their hook. Or fuck off.

That means we are playing for £90 plus the meal etc next Wednesday.

The winners of the Joke Round were 668: The neighbour of The Beast with...

Jeremy Beadle has an extremely small cock, but on the other hand...

Classic, although some teams disagreed.

I'll leave you with the version I wrote originally on this quiz report and realised I had fucked up...

Jeremy Cock has an extremely small beadle, but on the other hand...

I think I may have won.

I'll see you next Wednesday at 8 o'clock (at night) for another Pourhouse quiz. Another stonking turnout. Another cash rollover. Etc. Etc.

Fact.

Quizguy Martin

Yes the Handsfree Lightsabres dominated the quiz last week (!) and they returned to try again against some other teams.

Sir James Quiz regulars, such as the Honeymonsters feat The Bear and Optimus Cock and Captain Fanny, and a smattering of new teams, provided slighty stiffer competition than last week's quiz fodder I say "slightly stiffer"... flacid would possibly be a better shout!

Here's how it finished...

1. Handsfree Lightsabres - Winners!
2. E + J
3. Jaggie
4. The Honeymonsters feat The Bear
                                                                  5. Optimus Cock and Captain Fanny - Funnest Team!
                                                                  6. Quiz on my face - Round of Applause!

Janet from Handsfree Lightsabres defeated the cairds with one flourish of her ginger locks and it was just The Beast who stood between her and £50. But stand he did and it means next week we will be playing for a  rollover jackpot of £70. That's enough money to buy some pretty decent hair dye Janet!

The Funnest Team was Optimus Cock and Captain Fanny with...

A little boy walks in on his father masterbating.
"What are you doing Daddy?" asks the boy.
"I'm having a wank", replied the dad, "but don't worry, you will be doing this soon enough Son"
"Why's that Daddy?", queried the boy.
"Because my arms fucking killing me"

Nice. They won the usual tat plus a book containing ways to hide that troublesome cock and balls, when you are trying to dress like a drag queen. As if Optimus Cock didn't already know... that's not a slander on him of course, but I'm guessing he's seen Captain Fanny strapping "hers" down before a night out in The Shed.

Anyways... I will see you at The Pourhouse next Wednesday for a 8:30 kick-off. At night.

Fact.

Quizguy Martin