Sir James Pub Quiz Events & Entertainments
  • Home
    • The Mystery Question
    • Testimonials
    • News
    • Quiz Shop
    • About Sir James
    • About Quizzes
    • About Quizmasters
  • Pub Quiz
    • Full Venue List
    • Bungo
    • Gallus
    • Gardener
    • Lock 27
    • Machair
    • Sixty Ate
  • Online Quiz
    • About the Online Quiz
  • Team Names
    • The Best Pub Quiz Team Names in The World Ever
    • The Worst Pub Quiz Team Names in the World Ever
  • Event Hire
    • Weddings >
      • Sample Wedding Quizzes
    • Corporate Events
    • Parties & Events
  • Contact
    • Join the Mailing List
    • Win Beer
    • Client List

Top 10 Pub Quiz Jokes - Jayz Edition

15/4/2014

0 Comments

 
Caution: If you are easily offended, LOOK AWAY NOW!
Picture
What have tofu and a dildo got in common?
They're both meat replacements - Quizimodo

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist it! - Och Aye Whey Aye

How did Rihanna know Chris Brown was cheating on her?
He had a different colour lipstick on his knuckles - Maybe Alva Knows

I went into the local butcher shop and said to the guy behind the counter, "I bet you can't reach the meat on the top shelf"
"Sorry, but I can't take that bet", said the butcher..."the steaks are too high" - Up Jacob's Creek Without a Paddle

A member of the jury was identified as an ex of Oscar Pistorius. Turns out she dodged a bullet with that one - Fat Kids Always Get Caught


What's the difference between peanut butter and jam?
I can't peanut butter my cock in your ass - McNeill, get a round you cheap bastard


Where does a Russian go for a shit if they have no toilet?
A Putin - Fat Kids Always Get Caught


Jesus must be Scottish. I mean, he went out on a Friday, got hammered, and didn't rise til Sunday - Quizimodo


Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
Because she threw out all the W's - Maybe Alva knows


The class had come back in from playtime. Teacher asked Johnny, "What did you do at playtime?"
Johnny replied "I played in the sand pit."
"That's nice Johnny, if you can spell SAND correctly, I'll give you a biscuit." Johnny duly obliged and was given a biscuit. The teacher then asked Suzy what she did at playtime.
"I played in the sand pit with Johnny", replied Suzy.
"That's nice Suzy. If you can spell PIT correctly, I'll give you a biscuit."
Sure enough, Suzy spelt PIT correctly and was given a biscuit. The teacher then asked Mohammed what he did.
"I tried to play in the sand pit but Johnny and Suzy called me names and threw sand at me and wouldn't let me play."
"Oh dear", said the teacher, "that sounds like blatant racial discrimination to me. If you can spell BLATANT RACIAL DISCRIMINATION..." - Brulie
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Jayz

    87 Kilmarnock Road
    Shawlands
    0141 387 9046

    Venue Facebook Page

    Quiz Info

    Quizmaster Scott
    7:30pm Thursdays

    Booze & Cash prizes
    £1 Entry for the prize fund

    Archives

    April 2015
    May 2014
    April 2014
    November 2013

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Services

DJ & Disco
​Karaoke
Quiz
Bingo & Race Nights

Pub Quizzes

Sunday - Machair
Monday - USSA
Monday - Lord Todd
Tuesday - Bungo 
Tuesday - Lock 27
Wednesday - 6pm Bacchus
Wednesday - Gallus
Thursday - Kirkhouse Inn
Thursday - Sixty Ate
Thursday - Bar 1821
Friday - Alexander's Bar

Testimonial

"...a huge thanks for a great quiz night last night! I have heard so many good reviews..."

Leeanne McKendry
Corporate Entertainment Organiser
September 2013
Ideas
Parties
Hire
Contact
Privacy Policy
Copyright © 2019 Sir James 
 All Rights Reserved